Got Rapture? May 22 Meet October 22, the Great Disappointment of 1844

As you all know by now, I'm a Heretic. But I'm also pragmatic. Logistics matter to me. Logistics are why I didn't believe in Santa Claus when I was five years old.

The concept of a fat man in a sleigh driven by reindeer landing on my roof, sliding down a tight chimney and delivering presents never made sense. First, we didn't have a chimney. Second, while it might make sense on an individual level, it made no sense on the collective level. There would have to be thousands of Santas to deliver the amount of presents bought in my town alone, much less the country or world.

Logistically, the rapture makes no sense whatsoever. Classifying it as 'religious' does not excuse it for being profoundly wrong.

A preacher in 1844 prophesied the end of the world and the rapture, ala Harold Camping. He picked a date, Oct 22, 1844. People sold everything they had and waited for Jesus to 'come on the clouds and lift them up to heaven.' It didn't happen. It was the called the Great Disappointment (May 22 needs its own moniker, doesn't it?)

If you do the research, you can find hundreds of other 'disappointments' throughout history. Remember Y2K? What amazes me is that anybody pays any attention at all to any prediction of the end of the world. Obsession with the 'end of the world' is psychologically unstable, emotionally unhealthy, spiritually unsound and logistically challenged.

Remember James Watts, Reagan's Secretary of Interior? Google him. Have fun.

The problem with the rapture is conceptual. It's a bad idea. Good people can get caught up in bad ideas and do bad and stupid things.

First, it shows the dangers of basing a theology on one biblical quote, taking it out of context, and then projecting our own emotional and psychological needs on it.

Second, according to one religious group obsessed with the rapture, only 144,000 will be raptured. Since the faithful dead go first, and more than 144,000 faithful have died, why would anyone join this group? All the slots are filled.

The debate over the rapture is a ridiculous waste of time. Please observe that Christian leaders did not say that Harold Camping was wrong about the rapture, they just said he got the date wrong. This is because the kind of Christianity that became dominant in the west after the ninth century is psychologically unstable (see Mel Gibson), emotionally unhealthy, and spiritually unsound.

There are many Christianities. The type that we pick and choose says more about us than it does God or Jesus. Not all Christianities are psychologically unstable, emotionally unhealthy and spiritually unsound. But the kind that is obsessed with the rapture is.

Next: Christianity has nothing to do with Jesus. Really. Check it out.

Harmon Killebrew Died Today

Harmon Killebrew died today. He was 74. He was a professional baseball player from 1954 to 1975. He hit 573 home runs. He started out playing for the Washington Senators. The Senators moved to Minnesota in 1961. Harmon played for the Twins until 1974.
Instead of retiring when the Twins management thought he should, he played one more year for the Kansas City Royals. As a kid collecting baseball cards and playing Strat-O-Matic baseball, I kept Harmon on the Twins. It didn't matter that he batted .199 that year, he still hit 14 home runs in 369 at bats.
Like a lot of Twins fans, I loved Harmon Killebrew. Even though he was born in Idaho, he embodied many things Minnesotan. He was humble. He was a team player. And he could hit a baseball farther than anyone.
My first baseball memories were in 1965 when the Twins played the Dodgers in the World Series. Sadly, we had just moved from Minnesota to Virginia and I didn't get to go to any of the games. But my grandfather went. He showed me the programs later.
The Twins lost to the Dodgers in seven games, as they couldn't hit Sandy Koufax or Don Drysdale (well, Harmon did). I remember I was a teenager in Virginia and listened to the game on the radio when Harmon hit home run number 500 against Mike Cuellar of the Baltimore Orioles in 1971. Back then, the Orioles were a great team, they beat the Twins in 1969 and 1970 in the American League Championship series.
Harmon never did win a World Series. But he won the hearts and minds of Twins fans forever. He was the heart and soul of the team. The following quote from umpire Ron Luciano summed up what people who played with him thought about him:
"He was one of the most feared sluggers in baseball history, but he was also one of the nicest people to play the game. He was one of the few players who would go out of his way to compliment umpires on a good job, even if their calls went against him."
In an era before steroids and rampant drug use, Killebrew had some remarkable seasons. Here's the stat line on his 1969 MVP season:
Played in 162 games, 109 runs scored, 49 home runs, 140 rbi's, 145 walks and struck out only 84 times. For those who love stats, his OPS was 1.011 (on base percentage plus slugging percentage)
Harmon Killebrew will be missed. He was a Hall of Fame player and world-class human being. A role model for many. He was for me. Thanks, Harmon. For all the memories. For everything.

Wassup Bin Laden? Random Thoughts on Osama/Obama

RANDOM THOUGHT #1

Apparently, George Washington slept a lot. When he wasn't running away from the British. New Jersey is full of places where George Washington slept. One of them is outside of Morristown. In a park. Well, it's a park now.

In 1999, when Dad and I visited Morristown to check out Drew Seminary in nearby Madison (yes, Drew University is on Madison Avenue) we went to this park. The locals said on a clear day you could see the tops of the Twin Towers. It was a clear, windy day. We saw the tops of the Twin Towers. It was impressive.

RANDOM THOUGHT #2

I have enjoyed listening to conservatives twist themselves into pretzels over Obama being president when Osama got whacked. Just a reminder that partisans don't make very good Americans.

RANDOM THOUGHT #3

I have enjoyed listening to liberals sound like a bunch of jingoistic thugs. Killed the bastard, yeah! Just a reminder that partisans don't make very good Americans.

RANDOM THOUGHT #4

The Sunday after the Twin Towers went down I was scheduled to preach a sermon as a guest preacher at a small congregation in upstate New York. The minister there, a good friend of mine, thought it best that we cancel our regularly scheduled program and deal with what just happened. He invited me to do the New Testament reading.

I read Matthew 5:43-48. Nobody shook my hand after the service. Nobody even looked at me as they filed out. Just a reminder that when push comes to shove, religious people can abandon core principles in a heartbeat.

RANDOM THOUGHT #5

I don't think there's any truth to the rumor that it was Dick Cheney that shot Bin Laden in the face. That's not fair. It's well known that Dick Cheney only shoots FRIENDS in the face.

RANDOM THOUGHT #6

There may be some truth to the rumor that former Navy SEAL Jesse Ventura shot Bin Laden in the face. I met Jesse Ventura at a book signing last month. He still looks like he could kill people. With his bare hands.

RANDOM THOUGHT #7

Secular rulers and religious extremists are often allies. The Saudi Royal family probably funded Osama Bin Laden. The Saudi Royal family probably ordered the attacks of 9/11. Most of the those alleged to have hijacked the planes on 9/11 were Saudis.

RANDOM THOUGHT #8

Since the oil crisis in the 1970s, our government has taken orders from the Saudis.When our leaders meet their leaders, it is apparent who is giving orders and who is taking orders.

RANDOM THOUGHT #9
The Israeli intelligence service knew about the 9/11 attacks beforehand. They were there to film it as it happened. This was widely published in Israeli newspapers. Not so much in American newspapers.

RANDOM THOUGHT #10

Offered as evidence that the American government takes orders from the Saudis, the Bin Laden family was picked up in various locations throughout the country and flown to safety while air traffic was shut down across the country.

RANDOM THOUGHT #11

I don't think President Bush knew about the attacks beforehand.

RANDOM THOUGHT #12

I remember in 2001 Jesse Ventura saying we needed to send a SEAL or Ranger team in and whack Osama.

RANDOM THOUGHT #13

I remember a seminary professor telling me on 9/12 that he was worried the Bush administration would take advantage of the situation and do away with a lot of our civil rights and civil liberties.

RANDOM THOUGHT #14

It makes sense that the U.S. invaded Iraq because the Saudis wanted Hussein out of the way. The reasons the U.S. government gave the American people never made any sense.

RANDOM THOUGHT #15

The American people have acted like brain-dead zombies the past 10 years. Maybe now with Osama Bin Laden out of the way, we can regain our composure and realize how badly our government has screwed us over the last 10 years.

RANDOM THOUGHT #16

Speaking of zombies, 'Zombieland' is a really good movie. Any movie where one of the heroes gets a Twinkie at the end rocks. Bill Murray is awesome in his cameo as well.

Understanding America - The Venture Capitalist Coup Against FDR in 1934

Previously, we discussed that America was colonized by venture capitalists to create massive profits. When the King of England started to cut into these profits by asking the venture capitalists to start sharing the burden for their security, they responded with the Declaration of Independence.

Fast forward to 1934 in the middle of what was then called 'The Great Depression.' President Franklin Delano Roosevelt, a member of the venture capitalist class and cousin of reformer president Teddy Roosevelt, was accused of betraying his class by enacting several measures to ease the suffering of working class Americans.

FDR's perceived betrayal lay primarily in three parts. First, FDR abandoned the Gold Standard. Second, he instituted a minimum wage law. Thirdly, and possibly the last straw, he authorized collective bargaining among federal workers.

The venture capitalists were convinced FDR had gone socialist. From their perspective, nothing cut into their profits more than social programs that helped workers. They felt they needed to 'take their country back.'

In Germany and Italy, international venture capitalists were funding Fascist movements led primarily by groups of WWI veterans. American venture capitalists decided to try the same thing (many American bankers and industrialists were funding German re-armament and supporting Hitler's rise to power).

In 1932, around 40,000 veterans and their families marched on the capital, demanding payment of the bonuses they had been promised. The veterans were led by much decorated retired Marine Corps general Smedley Butler.

Then president Herbert Hoover ordered the army to disperse the protesters. Gen. Douglas MacArthur was in command of the operation, assisted by Major Dwight Eisenhower and Major George Patton.

Gen. Butler was a hero to many veterans for leading the march and supporting their efforts (one can speculate as to what the veterans thought of MacArthur, Eisenhower and Patton). So it was Butler that the venture capitalists approached to lead the military coup against FDR.

Butler, approached with the possibility of leading a military dictatorship with the president left as a mere figurehead, responded by secretly contacting a journalist. Butler went along with the coup long enough to collect credible information verified by multiple sources, which he then turned over to Congress.

Congress launched an investigation which concluded the coup attempt was credible. The venture capitalists responded to the charges by ridiculing Butler through their media outlets.

FDR said nothing. However, he was able to enact a multitude of social programs from that point forward with only token opposition. At the time, it was speculated that FDR cut a deal with the venture capitalists.

If the venture capitalists dropped their opposition to FDR's social programs, it was said that FDR would insure that no charges would be brought against the conspirators. If true, it was a brilliant move. It would have been difficult to prove treason against the venture capitalists as they contacted Butler through intermediaries.

FDR's programs helped contribute to the recovery from the depression and fueled working class prosperity after WWII the likes of which the world has never seen. Since FDR, the venture capitalists have sought to repeal these programs.

To this day, collective bargaining and minimum wage are measures the venture capitalists are seeking to contain, diminish or repeal. The problem they face is that these programs are popular with American workers.

It needs to be pointed out that the military coups led by WWI veterans were successful in Germany and Italy. In America, the venture capitalists in their coup attempt failed to anticipate that a Marine general cared more about his country than money and power.

We need to ask why hardly anybody knows who Smedley Butler is and what he did for our country. I don't know, but I'm going to keep watching the History Channel. Maybe between the programs on Hitler there will be one on Butler. Stay tuned.

Understanding America, Land of the Free, Home of the Brave - The Beginning

I tell people I became a history major because I got good grades without working hard. That is partly true.

But the mostly true answer is I want to understand what is going on around me. To do that, I had to understand history. Over time, patterns reveal themselves. Identifying patterns is one of the few things I'm good at. I wanted to be good at baseball. I wasn't.

Let's be honest, it's not an exciting or sexy skill. You get standing ovations for singing songs or scoring touchdowns or hitting home runs. Analysts toil in obscurity. But it is the hand I've been dealt, so there it is.

First, forget everything you learned in school about American history. If you didn't learn anything about American history, that's actually good. I'll make it simple and brief.

The British colonies were primarily venture capitalist enterprises. The English monarchy could not afford the cost of colonization. Private companies took the risks, which were enormous, and footed the bill. Many ventures failed. Roanoke Island is one example of a failed venture.

The colonies were created in America to make money for venture capitalists. In order to make money, colonists were needed.

First, to subdue the native population. Second, to establish trading outposts. Third, to provide security for the trade outposts. Fourth, to make money through commerce.

The venture capitalists (mainly bankers, merchants and landed nobility) used religious freedom as an incentive to recruit colonists. From the beginning, an alliance was formed between venture capitalists and religious leaders.

This alliance exists to this day. It is not new. Religious conservatives and Republican conservatives are the labels for these groups today, but they have always been the same two groups.

The Declaration of Independence, when read from this perspective, lists the ways the English monarch is preventing the venture capitalists from making the kind of profits they feel they are entitled to.

For example, it has been shown that "all men are created equal" does not refer to all men. Nor does it refer to women. The phrase "Safety and Happiness" refers to the ability to make profits and the means to keep wealth secure.

The 'long train of abuses' attributed to the English monarch can be traced to measures that cut into their profits. Basically, the King of England wanted the venture capitalists to help pay for maintenance.

Please note how the document concludes:

"... we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor."

They all had fortunes, they were all very wealthy people. Because they were venture capitalists, they understood risks, and if they felt it necessary, were capable of taking risks more cautious leaders would not.

America exists to create and maintain Fortunes for a select group of people. Laws, institutions, and customs in America are designed to protect and promote the Fortunes of the families of venture capitalists who founded this country and run it today.

U.S. presidents all come from families that came to America in the 1600s. Four hundred years later, most of them are related to each other. For example, Sarah Palin is related to President Obama. They all belong to the same secret societies. For example, President Bush II and Sen. John Kerry, opponents in 2004, went to Yale and belong to Skull and Bones.

Next: FDR, why the people loved him and the venture capitalists hated him.

Celebrating Simon and Garfunkel's 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' Forty Years Later

I was 12 years old when the single Bridge Over Troubled Water was released. The first time I heard the song on the radio I felt it was the best song I had ever heard. Early Sunday morning before church, the local radio station did a Top 40 countdown.

I listened every week and it didn't take long for the Simon and Garfunkel song to break into the top ten. I danced a jig when it got to number one, where it stayed for several weeks.

When the album came out, a buddy of mine and I went to the local record store and 'liberated' some albums. The one I freed from the capitalist grips of its owner was the Bridge Over Troubled Water album.

I snuck upstairs our attic and played it on a small phonograph player. The first song was the title track, I had heard it many times.

The second song, El Condor Pasa, was an Incan/Peruvian melody that Simon had written lyrics for. It was haunting where Bridge had been uplifting. Cecelia, also a hit single, followed. It was sheer fun and included some lyrics that were, for 1970, quite risque.

Another buddy said his dad told him the fourth song, Keep the Customer Satisfied, was about a drug dealer. This, for me, lent an air of danger to the blaring brass sounds. I loved the line "I hear words I never heard in the Bible."

The last song on the first side was far too mellow for my soon to be thirteen soul to enjoy. Garfunkel's delicate voice crooning about a dead architect meant nothing to me at the time.

But after that, one flipped the album over and the first song was The Boxer.

"I am just a poor boy though my story's seldom told, I have squandered my resistance for a pocketful of mumbles, such are promises; All lies and jest, still a man hears what he wants to hear and disregards the rest."

I was blown away by the opening lyrics, and the song just kept getting better as it spun on the turntable. The conclusion left me drained but spiritually uplifted.

The funny and fun Baby Driver followed, also with some wonderful cheeky lyrics. "I'm not talking about your pigtails, but I'm talking about your sex appeal."

The Only Living Boy in New York was a song I was not prepared for, it was delicate, beautiful, full of longing and loss. The vocals were probably the most striking I had heard.

Why Don't You Write Me hit a chord in my adolescent heart, visiting feelings of unrequited affections and rejection.

I knew that the Everly Brothers were a big influence for Paul and Artie, but I still couldn't stand the next song, Bye Bye Love. I realize now it's because even then I didn't like audiences that clapped or sang along to the songs. Most people can't sing AND don't have any rhythm, so for me most concerts are unbearable. More on this later.

But after eight truly incredible songs and the architect song, I forgave them for this boo boo. Besides, I am told there are people that like that kind of thing, my partner being one of them. Ahem.

The song that closes out the album, Song for the Asking, is an offertory of love that to this day, moves me. Maybe because it is about giving and not taking.

When I went to Boy Scout camp that summer in 1970, I took Bridge and my portable record player with me. I played the album every night over and over again. To this day, I have the lyrics to the album (except Bye Bye Love and Frank Lloyd Wright) memorized. It's a part of my soul, it inhabits every fiber of my being.

Last year (2010) the 40th Anniversary edition of Bridge was released. I didn't think I needed another copy until I discovered the new edition came with a dvd of the 1969 Simon and Garfunkel TV special. That TV special deserves its own pages. Until then,

"If you need a friend, I'm sailing right behind."

Thank you, Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel. Thank you.

Divide and Conquer, Collective Bargaining, and the Tower of Babel

"Let us build a city and a tower ... lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth."

This verse from Genesis Chapter 11 gives the motive for those who built the Tower of Babel.

The LORD comes down to see the city and tower the children of men had built and reaches this conclusion:

"The people are one ... and now nothing will be restrained from them which they have imagined to do."

The LORD consults with advisers. They declare "Let us go down and confound their language so they may not understand each other."

The result of the divine intervention in the affairs of the children of men was exactly what they feared. "The LORD scattered them abroad upon the face of the earth."

The Tower of Babel story, besides being one of the many interesting stories in Genesis, also illustrates the method used by those in power to frustrate the plans of the children of men: Divide and Conquer.

This strategy has worked so well for those in charge over the millennium that it has remained largely unchanged. Let's look at the efforts to destroy collective bargaining in Wisconsin. Those in charge in the United States have always feared unions and collective bargaining (anybody seen the film 'Matewan?')

There is a good reason for this. It is the same fear the LORD expresses in Genesis. Collectively, the children of men are capable of accomplishing whatever they desire.

We leave aside for now the obvious question of "what is wrong with that?" and move toward the Divide and Conquer strategy used against unions in the United States.

I was still in college when President Reagan declared war on the Air Traffic Controllers Union. The same arguments, almost word for word, used against the Air Traffic Controllers were employed against public workers in Wisconsin. Since 1980, the wages of blue collar Americans have dropped. Most of this has been due to loss of blue collar jobs overseas and the destruction of blue collar unions in manufacturing.

So when apologists for those in power point out that most American workers earn less than the public employee (largely white collar) unions it is classic Divide and Conquer. Pit blue collar workers against white collar workers.

The end result is that all American workers wages and benefits drop.

The prosperity of blue and white collar workers in the United States following WWII combined with the socialist policies enacted by Teddy and Franklin Roosevelt previously, scared those in charge.

They feared the same thing the LORD feared in Genesis, that the children of men would have the means to fulfill all of their dreams. Employing their strategy of Divide and Conquer, efforts to destroy the prosperity of workers in America have been extremely successful.

Racial Equality, Sexual Equality, Abortion Rights, Immigration Rights, and Marriage Rights are examples of social issues that have served this strategy well.

Popular culture plays a role, serving as a Distraction Machine that keeps workers from spending time thinking about who their real enemies are and what they are doing to them.

Let's return to the earlier question. What do we wish for our children? What is wrong with wishing their dreams will come true?

What is wrong with workers in this country doing well? What is wrong with teachers, fire fighters, policemen getting paid well? What was wrong with Air Traffic Controllers having good benefits?

I don't know, I'm going to check out what Charlie Sheen is ranting about today and complain about how greedy school teachers are to my favorite radio talk show host. I'm sure that it will please the LORD.