Showing posts with label Minnesota Vikings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Minnesota Vikings. Show all posts

Monday, October 25, 2010

What's in Your Wally? Credit Card Plundering and Pillaging


Watching my hometown college football team streaming on my computer this past weekend, I was subjected to a credit card commercial too many times to count.

You may have seen the commercial. It's one in a series of 11th century Norsemen (sometimes called Vikings) attempting to assimilate in modern culture. The commercials are funny. They are entertaining.

Then you ask yourself the question, what do Norsemen have to do with credit cards? The commercials all end with a catch phrase designed to get you to put one of their credit cards in your wallet.

So, I'm supposed to use your credit card because you have entertaining commercials? Is that how it works?

I would have stopped thinking about the commercials except for a seminary professor who told me about a BBC documentary on the melding of Freudian psychological theories with Madison Avenue. Most commercial campaigns after the 1940s have a strong psychological component designed to get us to buy products we don't need with money we don't have.

What are Norseman known for? Pillaging and plundering. They did a lot more, but most of what they did has not entered the cultural psyche. The pillaging and plundering is part of our cultural psyche.

My theory is the commercials are designed to get us to feel good about being pillaged and plundered. They are such friendly, funny Norsemen, aren't they?

Let's look at the math involved in the credit card plundering.

The standard credit card for this company has a 24.9 interest rate and $19 annual fee.

The card for young adults has a 19.8 interest rate and $39 annual fee.

The lowest rate is for the Prestige card, ostensibly not everyone has enough prestige to get this one, with an 11.9 percent rate and no annual fee.

Let's compare this with the amount of money you would receive for depositing money in their bank.

The rates range from 1.1 percent to 1.75 percent. Let's put this in simple terms. When you use a credit card, you are borrowing money. To do this, if you borrow $100 you will pay $120 with 20 percent rate.

If you save at this bank, at 1.5 percent, you will earn $1.50 from $100. The difference, called profit, between $20 and $1.5 is $18.5. In other words, when you give the bank $100 they give you a buck and half and they make eighteen and half dollars when they loan your money to some one else.

That, in other times, was called plundering. Your wallet has been pillaged. Today, we call it funny and entertaining. Banks and credit card companies spend billions of dollars mounting campaigns designed to pillage and plunder the wealth of working people.

Have they succeeded? Who cares, they're such funny commercials.

Monday, August 23, 2010

How Being a Sportswriter Made Me a Better Person



Accidents will happen.
Apologies to Elvis aside, and leaving the free will/predestination discussion for another time, becoming a sportswriter was an accident.
My internal editor interrupts:
"Uh, you may want to change the reference to Elvis."
My ego replies:
"Why?" (egos can be stubborn)
"You may offend people who like Elvis."
"How can I offend people who like Elvis if I'm already apologizing to Elvis?" (egos can be contrary)
"When people say 'Elvis,' they do not usually think of 'Elvis Costello.' Which is the reference in this case."
"I think of Elvis Costello when someone says 'Elvis.' "(egos can be self-centered)
"But you're weird and not normal."
"*&^%$#@!)" (egos sometimes don't take criticism well)
"Not everyone appreciates the continual musical references you make."
"I throw in movie references to mix it up sometimes," (egos can be defensive)
"Why can't you just say that becoming a sportswriter was accidental?"
"Then you get into that whole 'everything has a purpose' discussion." (egos can cleverly deflect criticism through misdirection)
"Whatever..."
"Stop saying that, it (insert word here you can't say on TV) me off!"(egos can be touchy)

Sorry about that, folks, these discussions can go on all day. It's why I don't accomplish much some days.
Before I was a sportswriter, I was a fan. 'Fan' is short for 'Fanatic.' I was both.
Whenever my favorite team (The Vikings) was on TV, my family would leave the room, then the house and finally, they would leave town.
I yelled when things did not go well for the Vikings. In the 1970s, things would go well for the Vikings until the playoffs. The joke was "I think we're good enough this year to lose another Super Bowl."
The crowning moment of my fandom came during a NFC championship game against the Cowboys. Vikings fans know where this is going.

The Cowboys have the ball near midfield with time running out. Roger Staubach goes back to pass, Drew Pearson shoves Nate Wright out of bounds, catches the pass, scores and the Cowboys win.
"THAT WAS OFFENSIVE PASS INTERFERENCE!"
"HE SHOVED HIM!"
"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU MISSED THAT CALL!"
Glass was starting to break in the kitchen. My family had moved to another state.
It gets uglier. Fran Tarkenton, who wanted to get to another Super Bowl to prove once again what a chump he was in big games, walked out on the field and yelled at the official who failed to make the call.
A fan in the stands threw a bottle, hitting the ref in the head. As the blood poured, fans cheered.
It was ugly.

I wasn't old enough to be ashamed of my behaviour. I was just mad that the Vikings had lost.
My internal editor starts laughing.
"Reminds me of dialogue from an 'Archer' episode."
"Huh?"
"At this point in your life, you would have a gotten an 'Unsatisfactory' grade."
"No, at worst, 'Needs Improvement.'"
Every once in awhile my editor and ego are on the same page.

NEXT: How I Got Better